So I think I have mentioned this >9000 times on this blog already but I have wasted a solid 3 months by eating shit and getting my original waist and stomach area again lol weh heh hehelelelelllllll and the thing is it’s annoying me because I do have random blasts of motivation and willpower where I would think oh my god I really want this and then nek minnit I’ll be totally content with my life in general and think fuq da popo food is amazing and I don’t mind exercising it’s just the bloody food that annoys the hell out of me
I have tried way too many methods of getting back into it and I have watched every single motivation video ever made and I know these things won’t help me if there isn’t any will from myself but this is absolutely terrible. Poor effort celine, poor pooor pooooooooor effort. The hsc and the fact that I am pretty happy with my life in general isn’t helping with my will for this but I need to find it oh.my.jesus.almighty.
And what annoys me even more is the fact that I know I am having allergic reactions to junk food in large amounts but I totally ignore the fact that I am getting rashes from preservatives or something I have no idea I mean the other day I had a meal at mcdonalds and I got rashes ughghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh why do I still why why why why TELL ME WHYYY AINT NOTHIN BUT A HEAARRTACHEEEE tell me why
I just had the biggest artists epiphany I don’t even know if that’s what you call it but yeah wow all this time I have been working in a style that I obviously did not have enough experience with
So this is going to be a big big risk with time, but you know if this complete change of style works out, this is going to be fuckn beautiful. I know that this style will be looked down upon by my teacher and kelvin but I think if I’m happy and it looks aesthetically pleasing, then mate I will have confidence in my work and my presentation will be boss and uhhhhhhghg
Because you know, if you are manipulative enough towards the markers and convince them how great your work is, then chances are you could grab a couple of extra marks. My english speech for example was done 5 hours before it’s due date, without reading both my texts, my content was bullshit but I got a decent mark for something the effort I put in. Awyiss, mutha fuckn false confidence
Also — I have had a health epiphany. I realised I have wasted 4 months, and by this time could have been pretty fine. Why would I just do that, time will pass whether or not I am eating correctly or not. Exercising is easy peasy, but when you get down to the nitty gritty of HSC or face shit problems that make you want to do nothing, putting effort into making good clean food is difficult.
And one more thing; thanks for putting in the effort. I honestly do not want to jinx anything, but mate I think I’m in again. I’m happy and I feel it from you again too; I wish nothing but the best for us. LOL where is my glass of fancy drink I want to cheers with someone to a great life omg
I just got invited to a maaaaaaaaassive drink up at my local park and it’s pretty much starting now and to be honest it would be pretty funny to just drop by at midnight to see how things are going down there I mean it’s just a 8 minute walk from my house
I look forward to hearing teenagers screaming during my sleep